


First Kisses and Last Names

by shipskicksandgiggles



Series: tumblr prompts [32]
Category: Iron Man (Movies), Marvel Cinematic Universe, Spider-Man (Tom Holland Movies)
Genre: Alternate Universe - No Powers, Bisexual Peter Parker, Car Trouble, Domestic Fluff, First Meetings, Fluff, Fluff and Humor, Gay Harley Keener, Getting Together, Ghost Stories, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-15
Updated: 2021-01-15
Packaged: 2021-03-12 21:35:39
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,220
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28767171
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/shipskicksandgiggles/pseuds/shipskicksandgiggles
Summary: Harley's car breaks down in the middle of nowhere. Well, not nowhere. There was always the house where kids say a vampire lives.
Relationships: Harley Keener/Peter Parker, James "Rhodey" Rhodes/Tony Stark (Background)
Series: tumblr prompts [32]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1566982
Comments: 2
Kudos: 160





	First Kisses and Last Names

**Author's Note:**

> idk why I went with this but hey! here we are  
> prompt: “I thought you’d be scarier.”  
> “Excuse me?”  
> “Well, I don’t know. I just thought, ‘reclusive vampire who lives on a mountain, he’s probably scary’ and … .”  
> “And?”  
> “And taller. I thought you’d be taller.”

Well, that was that.

Harley slammed the hood of his car shut and glanced around. Just his luck he’d driven to that reunion in his hometown without the proper tools to fix his car should the need arise. And his phone died. 

Great. 

So now he’s stuck in the middle of nowhere. 

Strike that: not stuck the middle of nowhere. Stuck on the terrifying backroad he took because he hates driving on the highway. And just his luck, his car stopped near the only house in a 20 mile radius. 

You know, the one he’d heard stories about as a kid. About how a vampire lived there and would steal the souls of anyone who trespassed. 

He sighed. Soul be damned, it was dark and he didn’t feel like walking that far just to get a tow truck. He’d take a blood sucker over a human serial killer any day. 

The driveway was… long. Which he supposed fit a house this extravagant. God he hoped someone actually lived here. 

Harley finally made it up to the door and lifted the brass knocker, bringing it down three times. 

To his surprise, the door actually opened.

Even more to his surprise-

“I thought you’d be scarier,” he blurted. 

“Excuse me?” The man who opened the door looked up at him in shock. So much for Harley’s manners. 

“Well, I don’t know. I just thought, ‘reclusive vampire who lives on a mountain, he’s probably scary’ and-” He knows he’s rambling. He really does. But for some goddamn reason he can’t _shut up._

“And?” the man prompted. 

“And taller. I thought you’d be taller.” Harley put his face in his hands. “I’m so sorry. Can we start over?”

“Please, be my guest.”

“God I am _so_ sorry. My car broke down a little up the road and my phone died. And so I decided ‘hey why not walk up the hill to the house where everyone says a vampire lives and make an absolute fucking fool of myself before trying to ask for help’ so obviously here I am.” He paused to take a breath. “I’m Harley, by the way.”

“Nice to meet you Harley. I’m Peter and also _very_ interested to learn that I’m a vampire. Come on in, I swear I don’t bite. Well, not unless you want me to.” He winked. 

Harley stepped across the threshold and into a well decorated entryway. 

“Not a vampire, huh?”

“Nope, though I can’t say I’m shocked about the rumor.”

“You from around here?”

Peter shook his head no. “This is one of my boss’s estates. Wants me to get it cleaned up for some charity event he’s hosting.”

“And let me guess. Your boss is an older Italian guy who holds weird hours and hates people?”

“You sir win the grand prize.” He handed Harley a phone. “Like I said, I’m not shocked about the rumor. He’s just like that.”

Harley snorted and looked up the number of the nearest towing company. He hit dial and waited for the line to click. The guy on the other end of the line spoke for a few minutes Harley hung up. “They can’t send anyone out until morning,” he groaned. 

“That’s okay. Honestly I wouldn’t mind the company if you wanted to stay for the night,” Peter admitted. “Before you showed up rattling on about vampires I was starting to think the place was haunted. There’s a few guest rooms upstairs if you want to get some rest, and I’ll be down in the kitchen cleaning if you need anything.”

“Are you sure? I mean won’t your boss mind?” 

“I can give him a call if you’d like, but I doubt he’d mind all that much, especially if it means you not spending the night out in the open.”

“Look, I have an overnight bag in my car. Call him while I run down and get it, just to make sure. Please?”

Peter sighed, but he pulled his phone back out. “Alright. I’ll leave the door unlocked.”

He smiled gratefully and left to go back to his car for his bag. 

~~~

“Mr. Stark, I’m fairly certain that if he were a serial killer, I’d be dead already, if that’s what you’re worried about. Harley seems like an ordinary guy who just had a little car trouble.”

 _“Given the fact he thinks vampires are real, I highly doubt he has the brain cells to be a serial killer,”_ his boss responded. 

“Given the way you tend to live your life, I hardly blame anyone in the nearby towns for coming to the conclusion, sir.”

A staticy sigh came loud and clear over the line. _“Tell him he can take any of the guest rooms. And you know what? You should break out one of the bottles of wine to split with him. When was the last time you socialized with someone other than me and/or a robot?”_

“I talked to Ned like a month ago, it’s fine. You don’t have to worry about me.”

_“I’m going to continue worrying. Check-in in the morning so I know ‘Harley’ didn’t murder you in the night.”_

“Okay dad. Talk to you tomorrow.” He hung up the phone just as Harley popped his head back through the door. 

“You work for your dad?”

“What? No. Why would you think that?”

“Oh I’m sorry. Was that your actual dad?”

Peter blinked at him in confusion. “Oh fuck I just called him dad, didn’t I?”

Harley snorted. “So that was your boss?”

“Yeah,” Peter sighed. “I’m not apologizing to him for that, he deserves it with all his fussing. He’s cool with you taking a guest room, by the way. Here, take that stairwell up to the fourth floor.” He pointed to the stairs in the den. “All the rooms should be open, and they have their own bathrooms as well. Holler if you need anything.”

“Thanks.” Harley smiled before heading upstairs with his bag slung over his shoulder. 

Once Harley was out of earshot, Peter gripped the edge of the counter and sighed. He was considering opening that bottle of wine regardless of whether or not he was going to talk to this guy. 

Still, he needed to clean up the kitchen a little more first, so he grabbed a rag and went to work.

~~~

 _Jesus Christ, who is this guy?_ Harley wondered as he walked into one of the rooms. Between the high ceilings and expensive looking decor, he was beginning to wonder what Peter’s boss does for a living. That being said, he wasn’t one to look a gift horse in the mouth, so he dug around for his pajamas and shaving kit and headed into the bathroom. 

Which was obviously just as extravagant as the rest of this place. Obviously. 

He decided to shower before heading back downstairs to get some answers. All the driving and getting lost had taken its toll, and the hot water felt amazing washing over him. 

After getting changed into his sweats, he wandered back downstairs to find Peter lounging in the living room, his feet kicked up on the coffee table and a glass of wine in his hand, studying a laptop in front of him. 

“Save any for me?”

Peter glanced around and grinned, pointing to the bottle and a second glass. “By all means, help yourself. Find everything okay?”

“Yeah,” Harley said. “What the hell does your boss do for a living, having a place like this?”

“He’s an engineer,” Peter informed him. “It was actually built by his parents a long time ago, but he used to come and work out here when he wanted to get away from the city.”

“Any chance he has any tools left lying around? Could spare me the tow truck.”

Peter laughed. “Lord no. His husband got him to stop running away a few years after they got married, so now he only works from his official workshop. The basement here only functions as a fancy ass movie theater.”

“Damn shame. So what do you do then?”

“Well technically I’m just an intern, but I can do a lot of what he can. Although I’ll admit I’m more geared towards chemistry than mechanics.” He shifted the laptop so Harley could see. “This is a little of both. I’m balancing these lightweight, more flexible cables against skyscraper construction. Could be revolutionary for a number of industries.”

Harley stared at him. “Who the hell _are_ you, man?”

“I’m a genius,” Peter said flippantly. “Honestly, no, I just like helping people. I’ve got big shoes to fill, so might as well get a head start you know?”

He whistled. “You know if you change the vehicle you’re using to suspend those things, you could probably get better aerodynamics.”

Peter looked at the screen and then back at Harley. “I feel like I should be asking who the hell _you_ are.”

“Just a mechanic,” Harley told him. “Wanted to do more, but getting a job was easier than college especially when you’ve been doing this shit all your life anyways.”

“Well I’ll be damned. You know, if you’re as good as I think you are, I’d bet good money you could get a job with some of the best tech companies in the world.”

“Darlin’, I’d pay to see you try.”

Peter seemed to consider him for a moment before closing his laptop and holding out his glass. “Top me off, won’t you sweetheart? I’d like to get to know you properly.”

~~~

He began to realize that he and Harley were more alike than different. Both raised in single parent households and trying to make it in a world they barely understood. 

They traded life stories: childhoods, relationships, first kisses, and last names. 

_Keener_ , he’d said. _Born and raised in a town 20 miles Southwest of here._

“Hence knowing about the vampire rumors?” he asked. 

“Hence knowing about the vampire rumors,” Harley confirmed. 

“And you think vampires have to be tall?” Peter teased. 

Harley winced. “I didn’t mean it like that.”

“Then what _did_ you mean it like?”

“It’s just. Those old fairy tales always make it seem like vampires tower over you. Then you opened the door, shorter than me by a few inches, and it caught me off guard.”

“Well it isn’t like I was particularly prepared to open the door on a broody mechanic.”

“I am not broody!”

“You were when you showed up!” Peter laughed. “Then you open your mouth, talking about kids' stories and insulting my height, and I realized that somewhere under that dark, handsome exterior was a nerd with a heart of gold and absolutely no brain-to-mouth filter.”

“I wasn’t trying to insult your height,” Harley muttered. “Honestly I was more stunned that someone was _here_ that I think I just said the first thing that came to mind.” His brain seemed to short out. “You think I’m handsome?”

Peter tipped his glass towards him. “I’m not blind,” he said simply. 

“You ain’t so bad yourself, sugar.” Harley winked. 

He narrowed his eyes, but he felt himself blush. “Damn you.” He glanced at the clock. “It’s late. Say you carry me up to my room and I’ll consider the height comment forgiven, deal?”

“Deal.” Harley set his own glass down and leaned down to pick Peter up off the couch. “Jesus, you don’t weigh anything, do you? Which room is yours?”

Peter tried to ignore the feeling in his stomach when Harley picked him up like it was nothing. “Same floor as you, first door on the right.”

He nodded and carried him up the stairs (Bridal style, Peter’s brain helpfully supplied), and nudged the door open with his foot, walking him all the way to the bed and setting him down lightly. 

“See you in the morning, yeah?”

“Goodnight Harley.”

“Night darlin’. Sleep well.”

He closed the door behind him, and Peter flopped back onto the bed. It would _suck_ if this was a dream. 

~~~

Harley woke up the next morning to an insistent pounding in his head. How much had he had to drink last night?

Not enough to cause a hangover, that’s for damn sure. 

The pounding… was not in his head, he realized. Someone was knocking on the door. He opened his door to see what was the matter when Peter walked out as well, equally confused. 

“Oh good, you hear that too? Thought I was going crazy for a minute there.”

“We should probably get that.”

“We?”

“What, you think I’m gonna let you open the door on some psycho alone?”

“Harley, I was alone last night when I opened the door for you.”

“I could have been dangerous!” Harley argued. “Come on, we really should get that.”

Peter sighed, but followed Harley anyways. 

They reached the bottom of the stairs and made their way to the door. Harley opened the door and looked outside. He stared at the man. 

“You’re Tony Stark.”

“I… am.”

“Peter, why is Tony Stark at the door?”

“Jesus, kid. He really _isn’t_ smart enough to kill you.”

“Mr. Stark, please. Mind your manners. Harley, meet Tony Stark. Mr. Stark, this is Harley.”

“Don’t tell me he’s your boss,” Harley hissed. 

“He is, and I would recommend letting him inside.”

Harley stepped aside to let the man in, and he was shortly followed by someone else. 

“I’m James Rhodes, Tony’s husband. I’m assuming you’re the reason he was concerned about his kid getting murdered last night?”

“Yes sir,” Harley responded, thoroughly dumbfounded. 

Rhodes nodded before turning on Peter. “He cried after you called him dad last night.”

“Oh?”

“Are you gonna apologize or let it be?”

“How do you feel about being called Pops.”

“Kid, I swear to god-” He pulled him into a hug. “Forget Tones, you’re giving me heart problems over here.” 

“Love you too, pops.” Peter grinned as Rhodes shoved him back into the house. 

“I’ll just um,” Harley pointed outside. “I’ll call a tow truck and get out of your hair as soon as possible.”

Peter nodded and waved him off before he ran into the kitchen, presumably to help Tony fucking Stark with something. 

His day couldn’t get any weirder. 

Once he got through to the towing company, he found out he’d have to wait another hour before they got out to him, so he slipped back upstairs to get ready and pack his bag. It didn’t take long, so he cleaned up the room as best he could before heading back downstairs to set his bag by the door. He figured he could probably sit out by his car until the truck got there, just to get out of the way. 

“Not sneaking out on us, are you?” Peter’s voice floating in from behind him. “Mr. Stark made breakfast, and I’m sure he’d like to get to know you.”

“I don’t wanna intrude.” He kicked the bag at his feet. “Anyways, I should stand out by my car so that the truck can see it when they get here.”

“I can’t imagine they’ll make it out here that quickly. Come on, humor me, okay?”

“Okay.” 

Harley let himself be dragged into the kitchen and pushed into a seat at the breakfast bar. Peter hopped up next to him and started making idle conversation with the other men in the room. 

It was comfortable. Domestic even. Harley almost didn’t believe that Peter was Stark’s intern from the way they treated each other like family. He didn’t have much to add to the conversation, but he was fine with that. 

“Hey, Peter? Mind helping Rhodey unload the centerpieces from the car for me?”

“Hmm? Oh, sure Mr. Stark.” He got down from his chair and walked around to the back door. Rhodes followed him shortly after, giving Tony a pointed look and a kiss on the cheek on his way out. 

They were alone, and Harley was honest to god terrified. 

“So,” Tony started, turning to look him in the eye. “Peter told me about how you helped with his idea.”

“I’m sorry if it wasn’t my business, sir. I just noticed-”

“-a key design flaw that once fixed will have a massive impact on the outcome of the project. Good job. Tell me, where did you go to school?”

“Rose Hill High School.”

He raised an eyebrow. “Where did you go to _college_?” he amended.

“I didn’t go to college. I’ve been fixing cars since I was old enough to do so, and I made that my life. College wasn’t in the cards for me.”

“Huh.”

Harley bowed his head. The idea that he had to have a degree to be smart always bothered him, but now, sitting in the middle of a kitchen being scrutinized by one of the smartest men in America, he felt ashamed.

“If you aren’t too tied down by your job here, what do you say about coming to work with me in New York?”

“I- _what?”_ he squeaked. 

“Far as I’m concerned, you qualify. Hell, I’ll train you myself. Haven’t met anyone with the brains to take on the old-fashioned tech part of my company yet, and I think you might be the perfect fit.”

“Are you serious?” he whispered. 

“As the plague.”

“I, but I- I’d have to move to New York!”

“Stark Tower has apartments.”

Harley knew he was stuttering. This was unfamiliar territory. 

“Kid,” Tony said softly, “you can take your time thinking about this, but Peter’s instincts have never steered us wrong before. He’s a good judge of character, and I happen to agree with him about you.”

He felt a tear roll down his cheek. “I’d love to work with you Mr. Stark.”

The man grinned. “Good. Now please eat something before you ride back into town.”

“Yes sir.”

Tony passed him a plate of eggs and toast with a grin. “Atta boy.”

They lapsed into easy conversation after that, and Rhodey and Peter returned with a few boxes full of centerpieces. As each of them sat down, Tony handed them a plate. 

Once Harley finished, he got up and set his dishes in the sink. “Thank you all for everything, really, but I should get back to my car so I can catch a ride into town with it.”

“Why don’t I come with you?” Peter piped up. “I’d love to explore the town a little if you don’t mind taking me along with you.”

Harley smiled. “I’d give you the grand tour if you wanted it.”

“Meet me by the front door in 5 minutes and we’ll walk together.”

He nodded and watched as Peter wrapped up in the kitchen and ran upstairs for something. 

“Be back later dad!” Peter yelled once he reached the door. 

He heard Tony start cussing while Rhodey laughed, and Peter half dragged him out the door. 

“Truck should be here in a few. Once we get into town and drop off the car, we can hit a few places I frequented when I was a kid.”

“You sure they’re still there?”

“Town small as this? Yeah. Trust me, they are. Coffee first though. You’re gonna love this place, I promise.”

“Take all your boyfriends there?”

“No actually,” Harley told him as he flagged down the tow truck. “Always wanted to save this place for someone special.”

**Author's Note:**

> all prompts are sent to my [tumblr](https://www.tumblr.com/blog/playboyphilanthro-pissed)


End file.
